February 14th is fraught for many of us. What follows is intended to illustrate how it is possible to feel love, whenever, wherever and REGARDLESS of your relationship status.

Let’s begin by identifying some of the different kinds of love:

Romantic
Parental
Filial
Fraternal
Altruistic
Self

The kind of love about which I am writing today is ROMANTIC.

How is it possible to feel romantic love whenever or wherever and regardless of relationship status?

Because as described by Sally Kempton in her book “Meditation for the Love of It”, your feelings of love, although perhaps inspired by someone else, come from you and therefore DEPEND ON YOU and nobody else. This also means that your love DOES NOT have to be reciprocated in order to exist!! HOW AMAZING IS THAT?! 

In my opinion, the majority of the suffering we experience at the end of a love affair, or when we see other people celebrating Valentine’s Day while we are going home to eat Mr. Noodles and watch Netflix, is actually us mourning something that HASN’T ACTUALLY DISAPPEARED. Your love is still in you, just waiting for you to allow its expression.

Let me clarify what I mean by “expression”. I DO NOT mean that you rush out and declare your undying love to your ex or your secret crush. Like the majority of emotions, the expression of your love is by you, for you and doesn’t depend on someone else RECEIVING it. I hope I have made myself clear that there is no need to infringe on other people’s personal boundaries in the expression of love.

Finally, allow me to evoke the mythical love of Psyche and Eros. Eros, god of love, fell in love with Psyche. For some reason, it was decided that Psyche was forbidden to look upon his face in the light. Psyche sneaked a peek one night however by lamplight (I for one do not blame her) and therefore Eros had to leave. To reunite with her husband, Psyche sought the help of her jealous mother-in-law, Aphrodite. Aphrodite agreed to reunite the couple if Psyche could complete four difficult and dangerous tasks, which Aphrodite secretly believed impossible. Fuelled by love, even in the absence of her lover, Psyche succeeded and she and Eros were reunited. 

Psyche becomes goddess of immortality, illustrating that the soul is cultivated through one’s own COMMITMENT to love and not only its DISPLAY

Feel your love people!!